Do I REALLY want to do this again?

A Photo from Ic.eland

I'll refrain from starting another blog post after a month hiatus begging forgiveness for my lack of commenting and blogging.  I have much to update.  We've been to Ic.eland (GO THERE!) and it was great.  Baby Girl is full of laughs and giggles and sitting on her own.  Nugget is a little pistol that's recently found whining and has decided that monsters, pirates, and bad guys are no longer fun, but scary.  I've started back to work and am working Monday thru Thursday.  I use Friday as my "figuring out what I want to do with my life" day to conduct informational interviews, study for the GREs, and obsessively research mid-career change on the internet.

And, I've started to wean Baby Girl.  It is emotional.  It feels wrong.  But, it is happening.  I only pump one time at work, but Baby Girl is eating two times while at daycare.  I still nurse her in the mornings and evenings.  She refuses to eat from a bottle on the weekends, so this is hampering progress a bit.  But, I'm going to only pump once a day while at work until she starts drinking from a bottle for us.  Then, I'll only nurse her in the morning and the evening.  And, eventually, my milk will dry up.

Today I went to my RE clinic to have bloodwork and an ultrasound.  My period still hasn't come....although I haven't expected it to given that we had to use drugs to induce my period at 14 months post Nugget.  My antral follicle count was 9, so it was reassuring that my numbers haven't dropped drastically in the past 14 months.

I don't know if I want to do this again.  I don't know if I want a 3rd kid.  I know that I don't want to have regrets about not trying for a 3rd kid.  I know that I love having my two beautiful children and feel that our family is complete regardless of what happens with additional cycles.  So, I think we will use the last 2 cycles that we have covered 50% by insurance and, if we don't get pregnant, reassess as to whether we would like to continue.  The good news is that my husband got a job, so that takes a bit of the financial strain off.  It was a little crazy to think about having to spend $15,000/cycle for IVF when my husband was out of work.