Lochia or first period???

This is probaly TMI, but I am curious about the experiences of other moms readng my blog....

My lochia stopped at 2.5 weeks post partum....yesterday there was a little bit of blood when I wiped in the am and a small clot of blood when I went to the bathroom in the afternoon. Could this be my first period postpartum?? I thought I wouldn't get it for several months because I am breastfeeding?? Of course, being the worry wart that I am, I am now convinced that I am not breastfeeding often enough and this is why the period came (many women get their period when babies start sleeping through the night). For the past 4 weeks, my hubby has been doing the 4-8 am shift so I have a period of 4-6 hours of no feeding and SLEEP!

Anyone else get their period yet? Is this really my period or is it just lochia? I haven't had any more blood since yesterday.

Weekly Mileage

My Running Stats for the week....

Monday, December 29, 2008: 7 miles no watch
Tuesday, December 30, 2008: 8.5 miles no watch
Wednesday, December 31, 2008: 7 miles: 1 mile WU/2 miles @ 7:40/3 miles @ 7:05/ 1 mile CD
Thursday, January 1, 2009: 8.5 miles @ 8:30 average
Friday, January 2, 2009: 7 miles no watch, 3 mile walk
Saturday, January 3, 2009: 15 miles @ 8:30 average
Sunday, January 4, 2009: 75 min elliptical and Massage!!
Total Mileage: 53 miles

I was only supposed to run 14 miles today, but the route that I went ended up being a little longer. It felt really good and was probably the longest that I have run in 2 years! My pace is all over the place, though. I almost think that running on a treadmill might help me get more consistent. I really prefer just running how my body feels and not trying to run a certain speed. It's worked for me so far...somehow I can still do 6:45 to 7:30 min miles in races, but I can probably run faster if I push myself. I was supposed to start running with the running group this morning (as per my New Year Goals), but last night was not a good night and I was too tired to drag myself out of bed to make the 8 am start time. Next week I hope! It's just hard when Nathan is feeding so often. I feel guilty having him eat from a bottle more than 1x a day and worry that my supply might be impacted if I start doing it too frequently.

P.S. Wow! A little over 4 weeks ago, I could barely get through 3 miles!

Ironic

On the nights when my little guy gets in a good solid 4 hour (and record breaking 5.75 tonight!!!) stretches of sleep, I can't sleep!! Arg! Tonight I can't sleep because my boss passed along a newsletter from our on-site childcare (her son is there) stating that because of the high number of people on the infant waiting list with siblings that there will be no openings for the foreseable future for first-timers.....When will childcare open up and what will we do in the mean time??? I signed up on wait lists for other childcare locations, but they aren't nearly as well run, convenient, or cheap (hah! if $565/2 weeks is cheap).

Other news! I did my first tempo run on Wednesday in over three years!! I pumped out three miles at 7:05 pace. That being said...today my 8 miles averaged 8:30. Getting back the speed is proving to be hard!! I am also trying to keep the calories below 2000 which is practically freaking impossible. I haven't lost any weight since 2 weeks post partum, which is when I reached my pre-preggo, but not pre-IVF weight. Well, I guess the holidays didn't help much nor did my love of all things chocolate.

Christmas Hazing

Nathan and his great grandmother "GiGi" and the stocking she made him.
My parents and Nathan.

My mom and the ridiculous snowman outfit that Nathan hated.
Nathan in his Christmas outfit.

We just got back yesterday from my parents' house. It was a great visit and we had incredible weather while we were there. I got in some of my favorite runs along the James River! Poor Nathan had to undergo severe hazing this Christmas, as evidence in the photos above. I was very sad, though, because we did not get one family photo of hubby, Nathan and me. We are going to some friends for NYE tonight and I am hoping that their Christmas tree is still up so that we can get a photo in front of it! For a Christmas present, I asked Nathan to either smile spontaneously for me...or sleep for 5 hours in a row. He decided to give me the smile, which I still haven't been able to capture on film. Maybe 5 hours of sleep for MLK Day?? Despite the hustle of the holiday, I got in 48 miles and 1 hour on the elliptical last week.

My husband and I sat down today and wrote out our family goals for the year.

They include:

• Financial Goals: Increase savings. Start Nugget's college savings plan. Buy a new sofa and loveseat. Buy a treadmill or elliptical. Maybe buy a new house (depends on interest rates and whether husband loses job)??
• Family Goals: One date night per week. One cultural event per month. One day hike per month. Have friends over for dinner once per month. Develop 10 family rules/quotes. (For example, my father always said "if you are going to do something, do it right" and my friend Anne's mom would always say "we all make choices" in response to complaining.)
• Travel Goals: Trip to hubby's home state 1/2 Marathon and visit friends. Take Nugget to meet his great great grandmother Virgie. Annual trip to Maine OR my grad school friends group trip. Trip to Glacier National Park or Crater Lake. Start planning exotic trip for hubby and me in Winter 2010 to Thailand...or something of that sort before we start trying for tax deduction #2. (The last two are dependent on funds.)
• Fitness Goals: Hubby wants to run the home state 1/2 Marathon with me in June. He currently does not run at all. Hubby also wants to join CrossFit and get back in shape. I have a couple of races planned, but am leery of making plans because I don't know how much training I will be able to do and work full time. My primary fitness goal is to make new running friends and race some 10-milers and 1/2 marathons this spring and then evaluate my summer/fall training schedule. I may try to do a duathalon, triathalon, or marathon in the fall. I've always wanted to run the NYC marathon, but we'll see if I can get in.
• My Personal Goals: Learn more about Abraham Lincoln and Civil War. Learn more about photography. Read two leadership/management books. For my non-profit: successfully move to paid membership; raise $20K; have high visibility spring event; work on developing executive committee; build high profile executive board. For work, lead my own engagement (1-4 staff) and determine whether I want to change my area of focus. In my marriage, work on not screaming when I get mad at my hubby and do not get mad when the house is messy, which falls into the category of "small stuff." Only purchase clothes that are needed for wardrobe basics, i.e., no impulse purchases. Journal at least 2x per month. Keep Nathan's baby book up to date.

ISO Running Partner

Finding a good running partner is like dating...you have to match all the essential characteristics:

• Pace: You have to run at or near the same pace. Someone a little faster is great because she pushes you...on the other hand...she can push you too much and you can end up with an injury or constantly feeling like you are holding her back.
• Distance: You have to find someone that likes to go the same distance. If you are a marathoner and your partner is a 10K gal, then you're not going to be training for the same races.
• Attitude: This is the hardest for me. I like to run and occassionally do races, but training never has and never will be the center of my life. I ran with a group of girls after college that wanted to make it to the Olympic trials. That has never been my goal. I like to run as fast as I can, but I don't work myself up too much about running my fastest race ever and training for hours on end. Now that I have a baby, that's definitely not going to happen. Additionally, I like to eat and will not run with people that fall victim to the female athlete's triad. I find these women suck the fun out of all running.

I have had three great running partners in my life.

1. "A" was my first. We met in college..we both dropped out of the same sorority and were inseparable my senior year. At that point in time, I had never run with anyone else...and was hardly consistent in my running. A and I went on a run for kicks...and found that we were both the same pace and had the same goal: to get out there and be active and laugh and talk. A had a seizure during one of our runs and stopped running for a number of reasons. Around that point in time, I decided to start running some races and started training for my first marathon--the Richmond marathon--on my own shortly after graduating from college.
2. After college, I moved to the Big City and didn't know a soul. Coming off the high of the Richmond marathon (4th place finish for my age group at 3:17), I wanted to find a group of peers to train for more marathons. I started running with the above mentioned group of women that wanted to reach the Olympic trials. For a while, it was great and four of us trained for the Chicago marathon. We were tight as peas in a pod...similar paces, similar attitudes, same distance. It was great...until I got injured after the marathon and they all moved away over the course of a couple of months. I was left alone again and had to take two years laying low while my injury attempted to heal.
3. Then, there was "T," a member of my kickball team that I bashfully approached because she had runner's quads. She and I ran together for a year...and completed the Marine Corps Marathon. Then, I had foot surgery and she moved to Chicago.

For the past nearly three years post foot surgery, I haven't been running with anyone. It took nearly 12 months to return to normal post bunionectomy and then we started to try to get pregnant and I had to reduce my mileage to 20 MPW while going through fertility treatments and then I was pregnant. I promised myself while I was pregnant that I would join a running group after I had Nathan. It's just more fun to run races when you have friends running with you. I'm nervous to get out there again. I just signed up for the Cherry Blossom 10-miler this spring and am starting to look at other races. I don't consider myself a terribly shy person, but the idea of going to one of the local running clubs and trying to meet a new running friend is daunting. So, my plan is to start checking out the three local running groups in January. The closest running group is pretty young....I have tried running with them several times, but everyone already seems to be friends and I know how hard it is to try to join a running "clique." I had many people try to do it to my post-college running clique and we were brutal. We were a four-some and we didn't want anyone new.

6-week update: Went to the midwife today and she said that I am healing up nicely, but would like me to come back in 2 weeks to see how I am doing as things are a bit irritated down there. She suggested that I try cortizone cream to help with the itching. I also went on my longest run this past Monday--8 miles! I hit 36 MPW last week and am hoping for 45-50 this week. The hamstring tendonitis is still bothersome, but stretching and my very own stem machine (I just bought it on-line) are helping.

Coming Home and Growing Up

I decided to spend the past three days at my parents' house. My husband has been away at training all week and we were going to have to come down to my parents' house this weekend anyway as my youngest sister graduates from college tomorrow. My husband is going to take the train down tomorrow.

It is a bit odd to be at the house that I grew up in with my own child. Usually, every time I come home I have a bit of an internal struggle with resisting some adolescent tendencies. Being here with my own son has changed that dynamic. I feel so much older now, but at the same time my youth doesn't seem that long ago.

I always said that part of the reason that I wanted to have children was to grow as an individual and these past five weeks have definitely made me grow. No longer am I (or my running by correlation) the top priority. I am on "Nathan time." This has been hard and part of me cannot wait until this phase in Nathan's life is over and I have a bit more control over my schedule and a lot more sleep. He is still feeding every 2-3 hours every night. At the same time, I want to slow life down and enjoy these precious moments as I know I will never get them back. Nathan has grown out of his premie and even some newborn clothes and no longer fits in my hand. I think I will always have a hard time letting him grow bigger. Sometimes, I lay him on my chest and try to remember what it felt like to have him in my belly.

Just my scrambled thoughts.

Running wise, I am not doing so well. An old injury has come back to haunt me...hamstring tendonitis. I actually think this flare up is more of a result of the large amount of time I have been spending sitting on my butt while nursing Nathan. It has been so awful that some nights I can't sleep, which is pretty amazing given how exhausted I am. I am going to see my physical therapist next Tuesday. We have worked on this injury on and off for the past 8 years. It is chronic at this point and I worry that it will never be resolved. I am still running despite the flare up as I have found that running doesn't make matters any worse and not running doesn't make matters any better. My longest run to date is 7 miles at a 10-13 minute pace. I have been trying to do more ab exercises, but my core continues to be very weak.

First Run!

So, after nearly 8 weeks of not running...I went on my first run today. It was GREAT to be out and active again in the cool fall/winter weather....but I was also a little sad by how out of shape I am. I have come back from numerous injuries that required complete recovery and it is always hard. The worse was recovery from my bunionectomy/hammertoe surgery in 2006....I didn't run for 8 months and one of those months was complete bedrest. In comparison, this recovery should be easier. I ran 3 miles and then walked 3 miles. I went between 10-13 min/mile, which is slow, but I didn't want to push it. Normally, when coming back to running, I walk/run and build myself up to 10 minutes running and then build up slowly to 30 minutes continuous running (which I usually find to be the jumping off point for runs 7+ miles long)...but I was being impatient. I think the biggest difference that I notice is that my abs feel SO weak! I have been meaning to do ab work...but it falls by the wayside everyday to sleep or chores or a crying baby that seems to think that my nipple is the only suitable pacifier. I think I will do 2 days on, 2 day off with running and try to increase my distance .25-.5 mile each run. We'll see how I feel tomorrow.

Oh and I am really struggling to lose the IVF/trying to get pregnant lbs. I actually gained a bit of weight this past 2 weeks. I am addicted to chocolate and other things that aren't good at me. I've never been able to diet. I think I might make myself get on a scale every day to make myself be realistic about what I am eating. Ug. When one wears sweat pants/workout outfits every day, it is easy to get lazy about eating healthfully.